Weston is Homeland Security, and she has been brought in by The Governor to work with McG + The 5-0s. As a sign of superior masculinity, McG tries to whump The FOY onto the Governor’s desk. The Governor will have none of this, and so drives out in a forklift and removes The FOY, while driving home the point that he wasn’t kidding about accountability, y’all. Remember when McG last week released the goon with the poorly styled bangs, as lure for Woah Fat so that they could find him?
Apparently, this isn’t good times fun times for the Governor who, when he reminds McG of his hijinks and shenanigans, Weston’s expressions are all WTF? OMG! NO WAY! ROGUE! but very subtle-like. In releasing the goon, McPanty Destroyer broke the trust of the Governor, and now must face the consequences. DUN DUN DUN DUUUUUN!
Like that time I thought I could walk beneath the hanging pipe without ducking and was wrong. Because I forgot that I was wearing my high heels and instead rammed at high velocity my head into the pipe and ricochet back nearly three feet.
Please let the record show that I hope Weston gets to straddle The FOY, as I believe that humanity is best served when we want for our sisters what we want for ourselves. LAUREN!! CALL ME!!
After some rumblings and a mention of the word “babysitting” by Weston, to which McG’s expression challenges “yes, but will you breast feed me?” the Governor very calmly shuts these two down and makes it clear that he ain’t askin’ nobody for nothin’. B.tches gonna do what he say.
McG, I just called you a b.tch; please punish me.
Finally! McG has found the vibrate option on his phone. (No euphemism here, dear reader.) He receives a call and as per uge, answers with “McGarret.” Neither hello no wasssssss upppppppp?
McPanty Destroyer says he has to take The FOY and leave, because there’s been a kidnapping. Not surprisingly, he and The Governor neither fist bump nor hugsies goodbye.
The Governor tells Weston to move her a.s and go with McG because she is now a part of The 5-0s.
Outside, there is some small banter between McG and Weston, with Weston coming out on top. (You’re welcome.)
When McG tells her he’ll drive, she says she’ll follow because I will have a better view of your bottom in this way, Alex. McG’s going to have some driving problems this season, kittens. First, Max can’t be a passenger, and now Weston isn’t interested in getting into the same car as McG because she might be a lesbian. TBD!
At the scene of the kidnapping, McG is wearing the sh.t out of this suit and thinks he’s on some sort of runway with his strut. Re the suit, I had not noticed just how much of the sh.t he is wearing out of it until now. They really must have more wide shots on this man. Or maybe I mean long? Dunno…leave that to the magicians of the camera men. Daniel BFFs like Janey and I, by telling McG he is all kinds of gorge and calling him GQ. He’s also really excited that they texted this morning to colour-coordinate.
Where McG introduces Weston in a not so gracious manner, Daniel is all sparkles and rainbows as he genuinely greets and welcomes her to the team. Remember last time this happened? It was Agent Special K, currently being s.xed by Woah Fat and then chauffeuring his Thunderbirds self around, because he is a puppet, and puppets can’t drive, silly.
One would have thought that someone like McG with mommy issues would like to be babysat.
I like the new gov…he’s one badas* m*fu*ker -yeah, I said it.
McG did look v v pretty and GQ like- insider jokesters on the writing staff must have had kick over that, since our boy graced GQ this year (I understand the lady writers on staff had a chance to spread their winds this week).
Danno was all rainbows and butterflies and sunshine, because despite the fact that Rach Hell stomped on his heart, tore it out and ate is to curb her morning sickness, Danno is happy that I kinda forgave him already and decided to wear my flats while we go for walk to discuss it on the beach.
Oh, and Jenna Kaye isn’t sexing WOOOOOH FAT. She is in cohots because McG killered her fiance. No spoilers. Just my theory. true.story.
The lady writers got to spread their “winds” this week?
Didn’t know they weren’t usually allowed to fart.
there are lady writers??? I stand corrected.
No seriously? There are?!
Yup!
Amazing, right?
Spread their ….. sorry, got sidetracked…..
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Can’t comment. Iz laughing too much…
“When McG tells her he’ll drive, she says she’ll follow because I will have a better view of your bottom in this way, Alex.”
And this: “Please let the record show that I hope Weston gets to straddle The FOY, as I believe that humanity is best served when we want for our sisters what we want for ourselves. LAUREN!! CALL ME!!”
Because I am a jealous b.tch – Nope, I don’t want her to straddle the FOY. Any of you? yes, Her? nopesies.
I’ll take that!
Please let the record show that I hope Weston gets to straddle The FOY. AGREEING IN ALL CAPS.
IF Lauren the German (OK, I admit, she’s extremely pretty..gag, gag) s.xes our FOY, I will bite down on a cyanide capsule whilst sticking my head inside my gas oven. McMo
Oh no!
Pauvre McMo!!!!
You and Ess!!!! This is your red line, it seems.
LAINIE! You may have to hold their hands in the event s.xing occurs, please.
yes, I understand their pain. we need to stay the course ladies. McG and L to the G will not be s*xing this season.
If Lauren the German doesn’t straddle the FOY after their eye s.xting festival, I’ll gladly take her place and take one for the team!
I love how you all have taken to calling her L the G.
I hope Alex got on that. I would.
Lauren the German is too long to keep typing plus I’m tired of seeing her name in my rants….thus L the G or the more clever Lainiek’s version, L to the G. I shall steal it. Sorry Lainiek
And Maha…STOP it…Alex is NOT getting on that. McMo
McMo is punching me in my sardonic.
LOVE YOU!!!!
I can see it now, me, ESS, and McMo, kinderapping LtheG and bringing her on a boat out the the shark cage from season 1.
Step back, ho-meland security chick!
Lainie would be in back trying to conjure rainbows.
Stalker would be running out to find McG.
The UK / Oz contingent would show up a week late.
A week late – I just died a little, that was good.
And Jayne wouldn’t know until January.
LOL!!
Oh Jayne. Let’s make funna her while she’s away!
What did I do??? Why must I be picked on?
We love you Jayne!
So much.
I don’t know to what I am responding!
Well I don’t mind what you are responding to, as long as that’s your answer!
Feel free to say it as often as you like.
Love yooooou Jayne!
Oh Kimmer, January! I should be so lucky, More likely to be next April.
I wrote that when it was surmised that S2 would be televised in January. That’s been pushed back again?
For Maha: S2 = Season Two.
Thanks God!
I totes thought you meant S Squared, and I started scrambling for my calculator.
They STILL haven’t said. I had to find out from Gracie that it was on next year! Gracie – I mean she lives so far away she’s practically on Mars & she knew before me!
And to think they used to get here by boat (Mary Bryant/convict and not Mary Bryant/not convict style). Could you imagine it?! Ughhhh. Months on a boat…..uggghhh.
Channel Ten fkrs aren’t so bad after all. April?!? Why even bother?
Wait, is this a joke, are you teasing me ? I am the Stalker you speak of, correct ?
Your’e gonna let me whaaaaaa ?
Let me seek out and find McG alone,
a l l. b y. m y s e l f.
Without anyone else from the group ?! ?
YEESSsSsSsSexsSsSsSexssSSsSexSsSexSsSs
Yes, loved the week later comment also !
There is no one who can hold the name of Stalker as well as you, lb523-75ght!! So much grace.
poor L to the G is my gal pal. she once said hey to me on 9-11 to say she was thinking of those of us in NY Metro area. why oh why did atplenkov sr have to put her in such a woo?
Hmm I was thinking, (happens occasionally) that I like the LtheG moniker, but alas, my feelings for the character Lori Weston do not match my opinion of Lauren the German. I like Lauren, still gritting teeth and holding total judgement on Lori Weston.
I think we need to come up with a term for Lori Weston, minus the real-person part.
Agreed. I can’t think of a name, though. I am not so clever tonight.
Well, other than peep-toe-ho, neither can I. And I don’t think that moniker throws out to the world that I am reserving judgement!
Patience. Thy name is next episode.
how about LoHo?
I can get behind LoHo!!
LoHo fits my world.
LoHo – Isn’t that the name of the street that cult-slayer guy lived on?
I like it.
Can’t believe it! I found the place where the name was born…..!
Thank you McMo for not loving L to the G. I was beginning to think I was the only one!
You can come on the boat too, Lele.
Kimmer’s building an army.
An Army ??
An Army of FUCUP’s. DUN DUN DUN DUNNNNNN
But wait, you can’t set sail without McMo and her arsenal, for she must christen said boat !!
Hahahahaaa!!
Mate, McMo is going to SERIOUSLY a.smash McG in his “limpd!ck” if he doesn’t straighten up.
I imagine she’s currently in Hawaii waiting by the studio with a bat and a crowbar.
TEAM McMO!!
“Like that time I thought I could walk beneath the hanging pipe without ducking and was wrong. Because I forgot that I was wearing my high heels and instead rammed at high velocity my head into the pipe and ricochet back nearly three feet” HA HA HA HA!!!!! Oh my goodness! I was laughing so hard I almost woke up the whole house! I have a perfect pic of that in my head because I have seen something similar happen twice. It really is a funny, funny thing, hoping no one gets seriously injured of course!
My clumsy is here for your amusement! I nearly passed out because I was going so fast and the hit was HARD.
I trip over on own feet and imaginary dust bunnies on the floor. I need Danno to hold my hand when I go oopsies.
I need Danno! That is all. xx
A friend of ours was walking very fast to come in our house and did not see the screen door. He hit it so hard he bent it completely, knocked himself literally 5 feet backwards, his hat flew off, his glasses flew off. Oh my heavens. I thought I was going to die laughing!! He said later he wrenched his neck. He was so embarrassed he wouldn’t come back in the house. giggle. You are lucky you didn’t really knock yourself out Maha! Did you have a big old goose egg on your head? Dang that hurts!!
No goose egg just egg
Me? I fkn trip and fall over EVERYTHING. Here’s proof: http://www.onefemalecanuck.com/category/clumsy-2
xxo
Ha ha ha!! Dr.s should prescribe you Maha. You are so funny. ( and pretty.) :>) people are going to think I am weird and a stalker if I don’t stop. But I am not. Weird. Or a stalker. or stopping. You started it. :>)
I am laughing my a.s off at every time you mention “& pretty”.
If folks don’t read her and Twitter, they’ll just think you *are* a stalker, and that I am entirely fkd in the head about my (smashing good) looks
xxo
so glad you are laughing because I laugh every time you do it too! Yes, they will think things of us that are not true if they are not a regular reader, here or there. The best was when you said something about “Alex meh, I am so much the prettier one” I die. Truly. Heart u something fierce!
It’s so true! I am way the prettier one than he.
XOXOXOXOXOXO times a million
So M falls over, Lainie falls over, I fell over….are any of the FUCUPs co-ordinated???
Maybe us three just know better and want to play the “we need ‘first aid’ ” angle.
Yes! I aim for McG duct tape.
I’m telling him to bring the NAIL GLUE
Correction Westy …. MthrFkn NAIL GLUE !!
Or MFNG
MAHA. I AM SAAAEEEING. MFNG = MTHR FKN NAIL GLUE
all of a sudden I feel like Garrett Morris from SNL… For the hearing impaired.
If you are too young to know what I’m referring to….. Go find it on Wikipedia.
“Go find it on Wikipedia”
You just gave us homework.
Hilarious!!
You probably all can guess that I am also clumsy, just add to the list of things I’m crap at
Jayne what are these other things you claim to be c.ap at? There is no such list!
So in the unco corner we have 4 ppl, go us.
Lelegirl – Oh no, you are far from alone. I turned green with envy from the instant I saw her eyeing the FOY. I begged Westy to send her ninja koalas to take her out, but it was not to be. Then Max aka Kermie & I tried to find & remove her in our dreamscape, but again failure. Now I just want to shoot her! And the FOY is walking on thin ice at this point too. McMo
Hawaiiobsessed: OMG. I should not be laughing, but that’s hysterical. Glad he’s OK.
Maha: Where the hell was this hanging pipe? Were you out and about with Killerer again?? McMo
Sadly, I was just in a parking garage.
Yeah Maureen! I am glad you are laughing. It was hysterical.
I have another! A friend of ours was working on our house. We had a hot wire up about 3 feet tall, that was on. He needed to get on the other side of the hot wire and instead of walking around the end he apparently thought he could clear it. So he straddles the hot wire and…. oh my….. he gets a shock near the … oh dear…. so he grabs the metal pipe to brace himself ….. HA HA HA. He ends up flinging himself on the ground on the other side of the hot wire. We went over there and checked out the “accident scene”. There was landscape gravel all scattered all over the sidewalk and big drag marks all in the gravel and the plants are all smashed down. Heee heee heee. If i think of that any time, any place I will literally laugh out loud. Poor guy. snicker.
Hawaiiobsessed: “He grabs the metal pipe to brace himself” OMG I’m dying laughing here…I can’t breath. I pray to God this man 1) is OK and 2) is a landscaper and not an electrician. Thanks so for this little tale. I needed a good laugh, even at your poor friends expense. Grabs the pipe…..still laughing. LOL McMo
KIMMER: “peep-toe ho” How did I miss this? Hysterical. I love it. Mo
“As a sign of superior masculinity, McG tries to whump The FOY onto the Governor’s desk.”
“At the scene of the kidnapping, McG is wearing the sh.t out of this suit and thinks he’s on some sort of runway with his strut. ”
These brill sardonics by preteeeee Maha are just a couple of the reasons why I must watch the 2×02 episode rerun.
No need to watch for any silly plot this time! Just McG and The FOY.
Best two reasons to watch H50. Ever.
Two thumbs up
(and The FOY)!Two reasons in this episode? Jenna & Kono. End. Of. Story.
“Babysitter”…..moral of the story here Mr McGooglyEyes, never eyes.x pretty girly girls at the watercooler…….they might be your babysitter and that can be awkward in future!…….unless The FOY has a babysitter fantacy…..