What did we learn this week, H00kers? That Crack. Is Whack.
R.I.P. Whitney. I am sorry you turned into a crack lady and could not battle your addiction. I am angry that you were surrounded by enablers. May you find whatever peace alluded you in the embrace of Allah.
Ditto for every child who has died since her death due to famine, war, poverty, and neglect.
Apart from saying “ameen” or “amen” or “hallelujah,” you may not discuss Whitney here. I can. Because…well…it’s my house.
WHAT IN THE? LoHo is washing off what is clearly not menstrual blood, unless she is one gigantic massive walking / talking / not so profiling Koala. She goes out to ask the nurse “WHASSAAAAAAP,” only to be told nothing before Governor Numero Dose (sp?) makes his way through the hallway not to ask about Steve McGarrett (whose blood is all over LoHo), but to instead berate LoHo for not telling him about stuffs. He’d also talk to her about that sitch in Korea, but you know…he doesn’t know.
He’s tutt tutting that she should have told him stuff and what’s happening with the slashes these young girls call eyebrows, he wonders.
He has given LoHo an ultimatum, and I heard it as either: sing for Hawaii, or 5-0. Only, I don’t think what he said, but if it is, I say: KARAOKE, baby.
LoHo looks distressed. Code blue is called, the curtains are pulled back on The FOY, and we cut to…
Hawaii 5-0 tinker tinkering it’s tune.
18 hours earlier, McG is looking extra handsome devil handsome masculine in a tuxedo, next to “Cath” (she who makes many loud noises in bed and misuses Gov pentagon equipment to ensure next booty with McG). HI CATH!! LOVE YOUR NECKLACE!! CALL ME!!
Is she wearing a jumpsuit? No. McG just called it a dress. But he’s a man, and he doesn’t know much of anything and frankly? He should just stay in bed.
Some cute flirtatious banter, McG blue steels s.xing daggers at the Governor No 2, before walking over to Daniel’s Pompadour to outbid him on football tickets.
I think Daniel just gave a big shout out to all of the Slashies, by calling McG a “topper.” Either way, I laughed out loud at this stressed out Daniel bro-downing with his BFFITWWW. It has been some time since they bro-downed while Daniel was stressed and all “wussamaattawitewe?” and I am liking it. Thanks, Show!
For the record: Both the Caucasian and Non-Caucasian H50 men are VD clueless.
Idea for McG: Slather some chocolate on The FOY, and make fountain noises. Shhhh Swuuuuuussssshhhh shhhhhhh, in case you were wondering.
Gov 2.0 calls McG and LoHo over for a chat.